Freedom and Independence to Be Ourselves

Words have power.  What we say to ourselves matter.  Thoughts translate into actions.  If we enslave ourselves to others, then how free are we? .  I was thinking about all this recently while chatting with a friend.  She said:  "I gave my word that I was making this trip to visit family...however, it's going to set me back financially and prevent me from putting money into some parts of my business that will enable me to expand."  So I got to thinking..."what good is our word to anyone else if we can't keep our commitment to ourselves?"   I was reading an e-mail newsletter I receive called "The Daily Love".  This part really resonated with the theme of today, July 4th:  " Let today be the day that you declare to yourself that you have inalienable rights and have the courage to stand up to those in your life who convince you otherwise. If any of your relationships do not promote your right to "Life, liberty and the pursuit of Happiness", do what we did in 1776 and draw a boundary. And like the Preamble says, if any relationship becomes destructive, it is your right to abolish it and create new relationships that promote Safety and Happiness. 

A single act of defiance in the face of oppression created a whole new country full of new found possibility and freedom. And so it is with you, if you are feeling the need for your own Declaration of Independence, have the courage to stand up for what you need. Who knows what kind of new life and possibilities are out there just waiting for you to claim your right and acknowledge that you deserve a better life? What would of happened if our forefathers hadn't taken a stand? Where would that of left us? 

If you are not in the flow of your happiness, then abundance, freedom, creativity, joy and love cannot be yours. And if you are not in alignment with belief that what you desire for yourself you also desire for others, then these gifts will also evade you. 

All beings are created equal and deserve happiness. Claim your right to happiness and let go of trying to control the will others. Give them the space to find what they need and give yourself the room to do the same. "  

The affirmations at the bottom of the e-mail read:  

I am free from the opinions of others.

I celebrate setting boundaries.

I am free to be me! 

And in that spirit, I share an oath I wrote for this friend to make to herself: I'm sharing it here so anyone can use it:    I, ______, vow to place my needs and vows to myself first and above all others.  In doing so, I serve my soul and can give a better version of me to family and friends."

 Print that out, sign it and post it on your bathroom wall. Let's celebrate freedom and independence~

"Be the light"...the mantra from my Kabbalah http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabbalah class.  So, I endeavor to be that in both big and small ways, whether it's changing someone's life by introducing them to their future spouse, by paying a sincere compliment or even just giving someone attention and acknowledgement.   I look for light in the world around me.  It can be seen and experienced through people like Donna Carter, creator of Fanny Granny's Eco-Bag Bracelets, http://www.stamfordadvocate.com/local/article/Angela-Carella-Bags-become-bands-of-benevolence-908416.php  http://www.stamfordadvocate.com/local/article/Angela-Carella-Bags-become-bands-of-benevolence-908416.php a not for profit organization that provides help for elderly women as well as the environment.  Eco-Bag bracelets, $5 each are made from recycled plastic newspaper bags, available through FannyFandango.comns 




GrTanny's Eco-Bag Bracelets, a not for profit organization that provides much needed help for elderly women in need as well as hDonna Carter works on one of her Franny's Granny's Eco-Bag Bracelets in her home in Stamford, Conn., Thursday, December 16, 2010. The bracelets are made of recycled newspaper bags, 90% of the profits from the sale of her bracelets goes toward helping elderly women in need. Photo: Keelin Daly / Stamford Advocate |

I love my Eco-Bag bracelets...by looking @ them, there's no way to tell they are made from newspaper bags.  I wear them proudly...I want to tell people about them--they're so cool.  

About a month a ago, I was at a party for Adrien Grenier's green initiative http://www.shft.com/.  A woman came in wearing TOMS espadrilles in black glitter.  I had to know where to get them & she directed me to their Web site since I'd never seen such blinged out ones in stores..only plain canvas.  So off to TOMS.com I went.  And I found a pair I liked even more than those black glitter ones...I found black lace crochet ones..And I learned for every pair I bought, a pair would be given to a child in need.  Additionally, the shoes are made from recycled materials.  TOMS, founded by Blake Mycoskie after a visit to Argentina, stands for "tomorrow".  TOMS has given over 1 million pairs of shoes away to children in developing countries. 

They are based on the Alpargata design worn by farmers in Argentina and they are super comfy!

The Counting Crows played in the pouring rain @ the Ives Center in Danbury the other night.  There were three opening bands and I noticed something I never saw at a concert before.  The lead singer of the headliner, Adam Duritz, introduced each of the bands and stayed onstage (off the side) during each group's performance.  I'd never seen such a show of support.  Then, before the Counting Crows played, the drummer came out to talk about their Greybird Foundation because they believe that everyone in America's thoughts and dreams matter.  In Danbury, the local organizations they partnered with and were highlighting were the Women's Center of Greater Danbury and the local AIDS project.  Now, they certainly didn't have to do this, but they are a band with heart.  Kudos to Adam and the Counting Crows!

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All these examples fall under the aegis of "cause related marketing."  I support this type of marketing.  It's a small but significant way to "be the light" and be an example.  Tell me about the causes you support and talk it up.  

Meant to post on June 9 because 9 is my fav number but here it is midnight and June 10.  So, this quote really got me thinking:  "Everybody has a secret world inside them.  All of the people of the world, I mean everybody.   No matter how dull and boring they are on the outside, inside them they've all got unimaginable, magnificent, wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them. Thousands, maybe." Neil Gaiman.  Then that got me thinking about Pinterest and people just pin pictures and sayings of people, places, things, sayings on virtual bulletin boards, some are even dream boards.  When I first heard about it, I thought what kind of stupid thing is this?  My friend Allia told me about it and "invited" me to join because one does need an invite to join.  So, when I first got into it, one night I spent three hours just "pinning" these pictures and sayings, I had fun and was in the flow while doing it.  Now I wonder if a study been done yet of people's brains as they're "pinning" or "Facebooking" to see the areas of the brain that light up.  It's got to release some major serotonin and dopamine.  So, Pinterest (and please check mine out @ dara411) taps into the the secret worlds inside us ...maybe even stimulating the creation of new secret worlds.  My goal is to have well curated boards in my different categories.  My guess is looking at these boards, the viewer would be able to know me more than they might if they were a Facebook friend reading my posts or looking through my pics.  So, there you go...everyone is entitled to my opinion!

"When the student is ready, the teacher appears."  Or maybe the better saying is "Luck is when opportunity meets preparation."  Okay, so neither is an exact analogy but you know those moments of serendipity when a thought has been bubbling in the back of the brain but there was no clear nor pressing path to get there?  And yet, one day...it all falls together,miraculously.  I was looking at a friend's blog and wound up on a page that asked me if I wanted to set up my own blog.  So, I thought to myself: "Okay, here's the opportunity, do it."  My 411 name was available so that's an encouraging sign...I do own imyour411.com so perhaps I can just redirect readers here.  This is an inaugural blog so I'm requesting critical immunity.  I made it to the Rowayton Farmer's Market opening today...primarily to visit the LobsterCraft....I ordered the Coastal, minus the roll because who needs the white carbs, really.  The guy looked @ me like I was nuts but tough nuts...bet he gets more of those kinds of orders than he expects.  The lobster was fresh, buttery & overall yummy.  There was also a stand w/ a portable brick oven cooking up pizzas (I didn't taste that) and other scrumdelumcious stuff.  I bought some really nice smelling triple milled soap and a tomato (tomahtoe).  "Twas nice sitting in Pinkney Park, on the Sound, eating the lobster on this beautiful June afternoon.

So, I found the use of a dollhouse in piecing together a murder  http://cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/06/07/using-a-dollhouse-to-reconstruct-a-murder-77-years-later/ both fascinating and macabre.  To each her own.  The strange occurrence of today happened when a Facebook friend (actually my friend's sister) posted that Shirley Jones had died.  I looked @ her link then cross checked to find it was another Shirley Jones, born on a different day and year. She remained insistent...but then her sister (who's my friend) posted that Shirley Jones was very much alive.  Point is, question, cross check and don't just accept misinformation @ face value.

If your palm's itchy, doesn't that piece of folklore mean you're going to receive money?  Well, the side of my hand itched...does that count?  Okay, back to checking e-mails...

Peace out!